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Mon13Jul2020

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How to maintain a friendship when you live in different worlds?

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[Apologies for the vagueness -- there are ongoing legal battles and I'm also being stalked so it's hard to be specific.] Over the last few months, my life was turned upside down. Strange, horrific, and traumatic events were inflicted on me at my home and there are ongoing legal and criminal court battles to bring justice to the perpetrators. Through all of this I became friends with a woman who was also a victim to this perpetrator in separate and different circumstances. Together we have formed a sort of peer support group that helps others in similar circumstances and we're becoming more prominent in our city.

We have formed a close friendship. I greatly respect and admire this woman and am so grateful that I met her through this strange twist of fate. I'm sure I never would have crossed paths with her otherwise.

I am single and have a reasonably good job. She is very poor, a single parent, is precariously housed and has been homeless at points in her life.

I want to get her and her daughter a Christmas gift, but I'm not sure what and I don't want her to feel like it's an act of charity. What would be appropriate? I was thinking of something I made but I also know there are probably a lot of things she would really need. I don't want her to feel awkward or uncomfortable in any way.

If you've been friends with someone who is part of a different 'social status' how did you make it work over the long term? I greatly value this friendship and I want to keep it.


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